I've been getting many questions on Twitter about why I left my guild and decided to start up another one. I hope this blog post helps clarify a few things. First, this wasn't a rash decision. I've been feeling less and less enthused about raiding with my guild since the start of Warlords.
When we started raiding, it was flexible normal and heroic modes, so that was cool. We had 5 or 6 new players join our core raid group, which were all friends of the Raid Leader. That's fine, we can be anywhere from 10 to 25 players now. The problem is, some of these player's epeen meter and elitist attitudes don't mesh with everyone.
We have always been a pretty determined raid group. We've been through a lot (171 wipes on Garrosh before first kill). But with this influx of new players, this brought a lot of negativity to a good old group of friends who made up the core of this raid group. For exemple, there was a lot of finger pointing, constantly looking at the dps meters, "It's okay if we have to carry her, we don't have to carry two mages tonight". The RL was unable to control the group, everyone was bitching and commenting on what the others did wrong. Everyone one was on edge. It was not a fun environment to raid in.
This made raiding seem like a chore, like a job if you would. We were not doing it for the fun of it and enjoyment of spending time with our friends. It became a twisted thing where it felt like work and you had to be there or you'd get benched. I pay to play this game, I don't get paid to play it...
The RL or lack of raid leadership was frustrating. From one night to the other you didn't know who was in charge. So obviously the loudmouths and negative people had free reign to say what they wanted and they were never called out by the RL for saying things that should not be said. The leadership was soft and almost non-existent. You had the DK tank who knew all his strats by heart and was a great resource for boss fights. But as much as he was a fountain of information, he has a narcissistic attitude and he doesn't care about other people. All he cares about is who is going to to heal him and help him get to where he wants to be and score the loot he wants. Then there's the soft leadership, the Raid Leaders had to get mean to assert their authority on the group.
So it was on January 1st, we had a raid scheduled. The negativity, finger pointing and sloppy leadership were all present as always. The RL starts giving the strat for the boss, then he snaps at the DK tank who wanted to contribute something. I thought that was harsh. I said in raid chat, "Wow the ambiance tonight..." Then I decided I wasn't going to put up with this, and I said "Happy New Year everyone!" and then I walked out.
On Monday night, after thinking things through, I write an in game mail to the RL saying that I was taking an indefinite break from raiding. I told him I didn't want to talk about it and that I'd rather step away. The next day I get a reply from him and he says "Well I'm glad you decided to quit on your own, because I wasn't going to invite you to the raid anyways. I don't want to put up with drama queens and a rage quitters. It's a shame you didn't come talk to me personally, it's really cheap of you to write this through in game mail. You're my friend and I still like you after all. Take it real easy now." That last part, take it real easy now is extremely condescending on his part. I was fuming when I saw that. And labelling me a drama queen and a rage quitter, when the DK tank who rage quit during Garrosh back in March is still a part of the group, no hard feelings right?
What truly hurt is that I've known this guy (the RL) for 7 years now. He's come over to my house several times, we had guild dinners together, beers, played board games, etc. He turns around and throws that friendship out the window, demotes me in the guild and tells the raid group that he kicked me out of the raid because I'm a drama queen and a rage quitter. He's giving me this bad reputation. I believe he told everyone this lie to assert his authority and to show everyone that he can put his big boy pants on.
What did I do to deserve this? All I did was leave a toxic and negative raid environment that I didn't want to be a part of anymore... I had had my fill, and I walked out.
And finally, this is 2015, I'm not going to put up with people who don't give a crap about me, who only think of themselves and are egocentric. I don't want to feel obligated to make plans with people I don't want to see and do things I don't want to do. And finally I'm not going to try and make everyone happy all the time. This year I didn't decide to make any resolutions, but I decided to adopt these guidelines to block out negative and toxic people from my life. The 3 I named above, are #3, #20 and #21. I found this on this post from HuffPost: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/01/01/things-to-stop-caring-about-in-2015_n_6390470.html?utm_hp_ref=tw
So basically, having been humiliated by my friend like this and being demoted in the guild, I decided I couldn't just stay there and take that. I decided to branch out and go on my own and start my own guild. A guild where people can have fun in a stress free and casual way. I mean if you like Pet Battles, then that's cool, go for it, nobody is going to single you out because you do that. I want to enjoy the game I pay for and I won't let these "EJITS" (as one of my twitter followers puts it) ruin my fun.
~Stouph
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